Welcome to The Library
Taken from a series of talks given by Anne to different groups.
WHO'S PULLING THE STRINGS?
What would you say is the best thing we can do for our children? Give them TIME and DIRECTION.
When I mention direction I'm talking about discipline and information, information that helps them make sensible and good choices in life, this is discipline also. This starts from an early age, but common sense needs to be added to the mix, for example you would not say 'no' to a year old infant if he/she was walking towards the heater and expect the child to obey, you would take their hand and say 'no' and turn them away. Or give them a toy, distracting them. Preferably, the heater would have a safety guard around it. But you get my drift.
This is the beginning of good direction and discipline. In some cases I've heard it said, get the latest style in shoes, clothes, video games, or play station, this is what makes my child happy, or, but this is what my child wants. Most of us know without being told that children do NOTneed or really 'want' the above material 'stuff' for them to prosper and grow as responsible well rounded individuals. Love, understanding and time go a long way to being the supportive loving parent the child needs.
How is it that some children in the twenty first century cannot entertain themselves? This is because they do not know how. They don't have the skills to actually imagine a game, discover what they need to make a car or tractor out of a carton or be able to figure out how to make a tree house. They "need" to have material gadgets in the form of computers, play-stations, ipods and the like supplied for their entertainment. Even the ability to communicate verbally, or use the medium of a pen or pencil to write a letter can be a challenge. They find it very difficult to sit and listen in class while the teacher is talking, and sitting at the table to eat their breakfast or other meals is a challenge for them and their parents.
Perhaps they are given money and told to buy lunch. We all know children will, on most occasions make bad choices when choosing food. This is why we as parents need to be observant and aware around our children's choices in life. Help the child make their own lunch. I hear you say, 'well they need to make mistakes to know what is right', yes, that is true, but we need to be there to guide, while they are young and vulnerable. Treat foods are fun but too much and we have a nation of tired, overweight, lethargic children unable to learn in the classroom. Or on the other hand children running riot because they are under nourished, yes that's right, they are not getting a balanced diet to help them learn and function properly. Treat foods should be just that, once a week or on birthdays or celebration days.
When its lunch or dinner time, the children are put in front of the television or sit in their rooms doing their 'own thing'. This is where some family units and discipline is breaking down, all the family members are 'doing their own thing'. Nobody respects others in the family. Jimmy is in his room playing play-station, Sarah is in her room talking on her cellphone, mum is trying to get out the door to work, or hang out the washing with one year old Jamie on her hip, dad's either gone to work or lives in a different house with a different family. Yes, marriages do break up, it's a fact and we, as parents, caregivers, guardians need to address the issues surrounding discipline and rules, and even more so when parents have separated or are in solo parenting situations.
Please feel free to ask questions below
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